A Letter to My Younger Self; 6 Things I wish I Knew Before

I usually pre-plan my blog posts but sometimes I don’t. This one is completely spontaneous.

As I reach my late twenties this year, I look back and reflect on the younger me who was a teenager & who was in her early twenties.

Truth be told, I am hoping my thirties will turn out to be better than my twenties and unlike some people who make a hue & cry about their twenties being over, I am glad I am turning older & wiser & fast approaching my thirties.

I have gained a lot of perspective in my late twenties and I am much calmer & overall just like this version of myself better than the previous one.

So today, I am writing a letter from the current version of myself to the younger version of me.

Here it goes:

Dear Mini-Manasi,

I am sharing a few things I have learnt as I have reached my late twenties.. I hope you find these points useful in dealing with your life.

1. It’s okay if people don’t understand your journey

You are young and you expect people to understand where you come from. Especially certain people you considered close enough.

You aren’t very vocal about it, but you expect people to understand. Life doesn’t work that way. It’s okay for people to not understand you and your problems. Even if you understand people, you cannot expect the same understanding from them in return, since they are not obliged to do so. Each individual is different & has different ways of perceiving things.

2. Ignore the body-shamers & stay confident.

While you have never been obese, you have been overweight for quite some time, especially when you were a teenager & in your early twenties. You have been healthy & have made efforts to keep yourself in shape. Yet, you have been body shamed to be a certain ‘size’ by many people including extended family & friends circle. I know that you have received lots of unsolicited advice by people who themselves are not perfect and try to portay themselves as being so. You have gone through hurt and periods of depression because of certain comments & have felt underconfident of yourself.

This is a recent realisation and although your approach towards dealing with such people has evolved through the years, it was not until recently that you had the complete realisation of all these things.

I hope you realise that just because someone calls you their ‘friend’ or is in familial relation with you, does not automatically change the basic character & nature of that person. If a certain person is spiteful, jealous or hateful, they will remain so, irrespective of how close to you they appear to be.

To be fair, you have also received a lot of good comments and many people, even strangers have complimented you and called you ‘pretty’, ‘beautiful’ and the likes..

Also, you are lucky to be surrounded by certain good friends & your parents as well, who have been your pillar of support, especially your mother.

You are someone who has never body shamed people or tried to put others down to make yourself feel better. Unfortunately, I have often come across people who are like this and I have realised there is little you can do about such people.

Dear younger self, don’t get bothered about comments from other people. Just stay confident & do your thing. Be grateful for all the positivity you have recieved till date & ignore the negative.

After all, “What people say about you is a reflection of what they are, not what you are.”

3. It is okay to say ‘No’ sometimes & have boundaries.

As a young girl, you did so much for everyone, you listened to people’s problems, became an agony aunt for your friends, gave relationship advice to your peers and in general you were the typical introverted teenager who listened to people but kept her own issues to herself.

You have been kind, caring, loving and compassionate to the point of exhausting your energy and saving none of it for yourself.

It’s good to be compassionate & the world definitely needs a lot of it, but save some of it for yourself too.

Dear younger self- Its okay to create boundaries & speak up and do things you like and stay away from toxic people & situations.

After all, an empty cup can offer nothing. A cup filled with self-care & love, will offer good things to others as well, right?

4. Don’t try to downplay & undervalue yourself

As a teenager & in your early twenties, you have always tried to downplay your talents & worth. You felt you that you were worthless and you worked on low salaries for a long period of time when you started out. You never went out and asked for more and because you tricked yourself into believing that you weren’t good enough.

You also downplayed your degrees,your education & your qualifications because if you spoke about yourself when people asked you to, they seemed intimidated by you, or acted cold towards you.

You then started downplaying yourself to win the affection of people. You did it to a point that you started believing you are a loser. You started to not be yourself and you became someone else altogether. Of course, being vain is not the answer, but having a basic belief in yourself is vital for your sanity.

Dear mini-me, it’s okay to be yourself. Just acknowledge who you are and stay self-assured. Don’t underestimate or overestimate yourself.

5. Don’t get swayed away by emotions & be more practical

You have always been someone who is extremely emotional (I know, you’ll say most women are), but you have been just too emotional in your dealings with people & you have been swinging from one emotion to the other.

I know now, that your emotional side helps you to be more sensitive towards other people and care for them. but if you don’t watch yourself, you can take certain decisions based on emotions rather than logic and it can be deterimental.

Dear younger self, while it’s okay to be emotional, you need a practical view towards life as well, in order to live a well balanced life.

6. Don’t take everything so seriously, have more fun!

I have realised that you took a lot of things too seriously in life. Every comment, every assignment, every task. Oh my goodness!

While this seriousness & sincerity has definitely helped you professionally, in your personal life, having a great sense of humour can change the way you see things.

Dear Mini-Manasi. just lighten up and take things easy. Don’t be so serious all the time! Enjoy and have fun and learn to see humour in the toughest times, it wil make things easier for you!

I hope you found this letter useful,

Yours Lovingly,

Manasi.

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To sum it all up, I would just simply wish that my younger self knew all the things I know now, that is, to be more carefree & have fun, to strive to be healthy and to ignore the haters & not let negative comments get under my skin and to set boundaries & realise everyone is wired differenly & not to expect people around me to understand me.

I still struggle with certain things that I have said above and many other things as well, but I have realised that I have come a long way in acknowledging certain things & that I am not perfect, I have my flaws & that itis absolutely fine to be imperfect as long as I am true to myself!

No one owes anything to anyone in this life, we all are free to make choices, it’s upto us to make the one’s we feel are right for us and for the poeple around us.

Also, it’s okay to make mistakes, because, otherwise, how will we learn??

Every step of life brings out a different & upgraded version of ourselves, doesn’t it?

So, I hope you enjoyed this article and maybe some points hit home for you and were applicable to you too!

What kind of letter would you write to your younger self?

Uplifting Poem on Uncertainty during Current Times.

Uncertainty,

It has engulfed us entirely

It has made us miserable

It has made us fretful

It has made us irate

It has made us jittery…..

The looming Uncertainty,

is like a double-edged sword

unwittingly teaching us

to slow down

to rethink

to regorganize

to be more kind

to be more understanding

to be more loving…

Uncertainty

is surely exasperating

but it is making us

get in touch with ourselves

get connected to our loved ones

and see the world

from a different perspective…

Uncertainty has

helped us value what we have

and let go of what we don’t need

It has taught us

resilience and patience

courage and compassion..

Uncertainty is unnerving

Uncomfortable

and Chaotic

but strangely

it has taught us

to find Calm amid the Chaos

to find Hope amid Despair

to find Valour amid Fear

to find Happiness amid the Gloom

and to find Humanity amid Brutality..

It has shown us that

the only thing certain in life

is Uncertainty....

……………………………………………………………………………………..

Let us hope for the world to heal soon…

See you all in the next post.

Till then,

Dream, Imagine, Be Crazy, You.

Coronavirus: 5 ways to deal with Anxiety.

_{*Disclosure* Some of the links in this post might be affiliate links. This means that if you click on the link & make a purchase, I’ll receive some commission- at no extra cost to you, which helps me cover the costs for this blog.}

Hi everyone! I hope you are doing good. It has been a crazy year till now, hasn’t it??

Personally, I had my Dance Movement Therapy Program going on in the entire month of February, when the news of COVID-19 was fairly new.

I currently reside in Singapore, which was one of the first countries to get affected by the Coronavirus.

Singapore saw COVID-19 cases extremely early, and people were in such state of panic! All the grocery stores and malls were flooded with people trying to buy things and hoard them!

Singapore saw some bizzare cases- a woman carrying 10 packs of 10 kg rice, i.e 100 kgs of rice, someone had ordered 800 kgs of items from the online store called redmart and so on!

There was a point where it became tough for us to find any daily grocery items. The mall racks were empty, the online stores ran out of supplies, it was a total state of chaos!

Amid that I had my weekly program sessions going on, which few of the participants were hesitant to attend due to the virus scare.

It’s 7th of April today, and the panic around COVID-19 has increased instead of dying down. The number of cases have significantly risen in Singapore.

The WHO has declared it a pandemic and from what I gather, countries like Italy, Germany & the UK & US have been severely hit and people are suffering. My heart goes out to everyone suffering. India has been under a total lockdown as I write this.

In Singapore, today marks the first day of ‘Circuit Breaking’ of the virus which means that it is a partial lockdown here, with everything operating minimally and people working from home.

There are some people who are still hoarding unnecessary amounts of food and grocery but the magnitude has lessened than the initial phase and the Singapore Government is doing a great job and doing it’s best in spreading awareness and taking measures to contain the virus.

Since I have had to indefinitely postpone the last session of my DMT Program, I am currently keeping myself updated with what is going around and taking precautions against the virus.

The last few days have been a bit tough for me and since I am quite sensitive to the vibes around me, I have been feeling quite anxious and restless.

I haven’t been feeling like writing posts on my blog and have posted very little of content on my YouTube Channel until now.

Now that I am finally managing my anxiety and keeping my thoughts in check and coping better with what is happening worldwide, I am writing a blog post on how to manage anxiety during this time.

I am sure I am not the only one who has been feeling a bit lost or anxious or depressed. The world is collectively going through a lot of mental stress. It is important that we address this anxiety in order to function better during this time.Our mental health during such a time is as important as our physical health.

Here are some ways to manage anxiety & other negative emotions:

1. Sleep

We all keep cribbing that we don’t have time to get enough sleep due to our hectic schedules. Now that we have some time on our hands, we really need to focus on getting our body clocks right and resetting our bio-rythms.

Sleep is a good way to reduce anxiety as well as optimize our health.

It is important to sleep just the right amount. Too less sleep can increase your anxiety levels and fire up your stress hormone (cortisol) whereas too much of sleep can make you lethargic and dull and you will end up feeling depressed and less productive.

The ideal sleep time would be 7-8 hours.

2. Gratitude & Focus on Positivity

Being grateful for what we have in our lives can surely help reduce anxiety. It could be the smallest of the thing like eating your favourite fruit or having a good place to stay. There are so many unfortunate people out there and now is the best time to count your blessings!

When we are grateful for whatever we have in life, our mind shifts it’s focus from the negative things around us and we realize we have so much more than we acknowledge.

Gratitude is the key to reduce anxiety. As our mind focuses on what we have instead of what we lack, our stress levels go down and we experience a surge of happy emotions.

Also, reducing our consumption of news via television or other channels is extremely essential. Of course staying abreast of all that is happening is important, but it is also necessary to not be bogged down by too much information & negative news.

Focusing on positive news/happenings and being grateful for whatever we have definitely helps in reducing anxiety.

Maintaining a gratitude journal or writing inspiring & positive quotes on post-it notes is a great way to keep yourself positive.

So, what are you grateful for today?

3. Creativity & Hobbies

Now, when was the last time you pursued your hobby or tried your hand at something new?

Like I mentioned previously, being at home and having time on your hands is what most of us wished for,didn’t we?

Now that we actually have the time, the perfect way to utilize it would be by pursing our hobbies and by doing something creative.

If you’ve ever thought of learning a new skill or an pursuing old one, this is the time! Whether it is cooking, reading, writing, gardening, dancing, singing, playing the guitar, or drawing, painting and craft, it’s time for us to don a few hats and try something unique.

I have been getting back to my favourite hobbies of reading, drawing and crayon colouring. I have been an avid reader all my life and have now seized the opportunity to grab a book and a cuppa’ and spend my afternoon wonderfully!

Me reading a book on my kindle and enjoying some coffee & peanut butter toast.

I usually cook as well and love experimenting with ingredients in my kitchen.

Being creative is fun, keeps us engaged and helps us utilize our time efficiently.

Crayon Art by Me.

So what’s stopping you? Go ahead and get creative! Encourage your family and friends to get creative too!

4. Meditation

Exercise and meditation are excellent stress busters. Whether it is yoga, or lifting weights at home or doing zumba at home, there is so much you can do to get your adrenaline levels pumping and to boost your mood.

Here’s a recent video on my YouTube Channel, on interesting exercises you can do at home. –Check Here.

Meditation is something I do every single day and I would recommend that to everyone else as well.

Meditation gives you the energy and deep rest that even hours of sleep cannot.

Meditation helps you connect with yourself and relieves your anxiety, increases your confidence and keeps you positive and helps you become more fruitful throughout the day.

Meditating even for 15-20 mins a day is good enough. There are so many online meditations available out there, you can take help of those as well.

My favourite are guided online meditations by Spiritual Guru & Founder of the Art Of Living Foundation. Here is a link for you to check the meditations on YouTube- Click Here.

I highly recommend them for stress relief and for feeling refreshed.

5. Virtual Connect with Family & Friends

At times like these when we cannot meet our family & friends in person, social media is proving to be our best friend.

If you are feeling anxious, you can relieve your anxiety by connecting with your family & friends on whatsapp, phone, video call or on social media platforms like facebook and instagram.

Reconnecting with old friends whom you haven’t been able to keep in touch with, is also a great way to boost your spirits during this time.

Also, it is crucial to note that what kind of conversations we have with our family & friends have an impact on our minds. It is essential to steer away from negative & panic-inducing conversations and have more happy and encouraging conversations with each other. So it is important to be mindful of this fact.

Encouraging each other and being there for others who may be feeling anxious is extremely significant.

Who knows, your phone/video call or a simple hello might boost somebody else’s spirits?

Loneliness can lead to anxiety and depression, especially for those who live alone. It’s time to check up on each other!!

Let’s start connecting!

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So those were a few ways which I feel are definitely useful in relieving anxiety during the COVID-19 Pandemic.

Now is the time when we all should be standing by each other and stay away from rumours, take precautions and not panic.

Let’s be considerate of each other during this time.

Let’s be more understanding and sensible.

Let’s be HUMAN.